I think I should self-examine due to those unhealthy intention that have been concurred my mind. This is my new and my last semester in MMU , I felt something change in me to Bear. I lost my passionate and feeling to him. It is serious and sadden me all the time. Especially I was addicted to chat with the net frn while chasing him out from my room. I think I did too much and hate myself too, but i dunno what to do, just felt like dun wanna talk or see him tht time. I would like to let others guys to understand more on me instead of him.
Basically, I was giving chances to him to show appreciation to me, but in many times, especially in front of my frns, he did radiculously that I felt really strange and start wondering is he my bf??? Sometimes, I will think that whether I was expected too much from him, I admit so. But some feeling doesnt work well and I gradually found some unconnection with him. To my life and to my future. I know I shall face the true one day, but not ready yet. I scare of making wrong decision coz he gain good reputation as a nice man among my family and frns, I afraid of hurting him, i afraid of cant bear the lost of him. Maybe I should not be too objective or to be ego to him, I should gv myself a chance to treasure him back or re-consider him? Because, I know I'm not that outstanding that can fail ppl in a relationship, if consider my outer imej, I should admit that I dont have the conditions to fail a guy who treat me nice although not better. I should wake myself up. What should I expect for? Why am I so greedy? Who else I'm still looking for? I think the one who should learn to treasure a person is me.
I should not expect too much from a peaceful and wonderful relationship. Learn to appreciate everyone around me without hurt. I might meet new friend but should meet with healthy mind and always remember to be honest to my love one, so that they wont be hurt.
Final semester should be a semester to speed up my acheivement into the highest. Meanwhile, the most important is to prepare myself in every aspect to face the future challenges. Please set aside those mentally trouble matters and concentrate on what is mean to me in current and future.
TYL! WAKE UP!!!!!!!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Saturday, January 2, 2010
2010, new plan and hope.
Soon i will be graduted from Bachelor in Law this coming May. What next?? this question keep popping in my mind. is the time for me to plan it detaily.
Tml is a special day where Y moved bk our house. the reaction of us to her move was not tht welcome. hopefully we will hv smooth day to live with her lar, no matter how she is still my sis.
next week will be the langkawi trip, really hope that everything will be going very smoothly, everyone will hv fun and play together with all joy n freindship.
going to grad soon, start to think of ways to clear off my stuffs in melaka. searching jobs and put final extra effort to enjoy my last sememster study, time flies, i got many hope to make my dream come true, i just wish i can manage all things in time, curb all prob without disturbance in mind, maintain love with friends and families, be mature and walk along line to be a conscious lawyer :)
GOD BLESS~
Tml is a special day where Y moved bk our house. the reaction of us to her move was not tht welcome. hopefully we will hv smooth day to live with her lar, no matter how she is still my sis.
next week will be the langkawi trip, really hope that everything will be going very smoothly, everyone will hv fun and play together with all joy n freindship.
going to grad soon, start to think of ways to clear off my stuffs in melaka. searching jobs and put final extra effort to enjoy my last sememster study, time flies, i got many hope to make my dream come true, i just wish i can manage all things in time, curb all prob without disturbance in mind, maintain love with friends and families, be mature and walk along line to be a conscious lawyer :)
GOD BLESS~
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