How I value and view myself

Last Satutrday morning, I've been through an hour of interview in my life. Mr Yeo, my potential employer has been tested the every aspect of me within this hour yet I felt quite suffering and in many time I felt embarrass to my answer because his facial expression told me his unsatisfaction in most of the time. However, he will nod his head to show agree if he felt comfortable to my answer.

During the interview session, there are several questions that require me to ascertain my position and status such as my ability in Law, my perspective to deal with the cases that relate my conscience, my weakness, the most preferable subjects and books and why..etc.. those questions seems like easy to answer, but I'll end up with no case to answer. Then only I discovered that I'm an empty person, so empty that difficult to find a single value in me.

Finaly, it was his turn to give his perpective on me. He said that I impress him because of my hardworking in term of willingness to do or experience to work such as sales girl or waitress where most of the law students would not. However the only weakness which is huge and serious to me is my English standard that considered as not adequate to his firm and to be a good lawyer. Sound direct and straight forward. Of cause, a little disappointment had influenced me. Nevertheless, he has been successfully pointed out an undisputed fact on me which I should know since I've took 3 times of MUET at 2 years ago. He let me know the true problem of me and I felt thankful to him too.

From now on, I should realise my own value, my expertise,my strenght and to face my weakness bravely. I want to be a person who like to prove the impossible to possible and challenge the difficulty for the success. Yes, this is the perseverance that inherited from my ancestor, thus I cant get rid from this spiritual stamina of Chinese.

Newspaper is again revealed M criticizing chinese as being so greedy due to never satisfy the advantages and status that we have today. M further said that since the Malaysia financial mainstream has been dominated by us, therefore M should be protected by Art 153 FC persistently where we should never challenge or argue their benefit base on that point of view. When you read the Article as a whole you will easily find the gaps among the arguments. For instance, M contended that we should satisfy to what we have now since 9 out of 10 of the Malaysian millionare were C. We should pity M cause they are not dominant of Malaysia's financial mainstream. So what?

So, because we were putting too much of effort to earn a more comfortable living, therefore we should pity them who were the human being with the similar and equal ability but lack of hardworking to acheive the same as us?

So, because we are so hardworking until to dominate financial mainstream in the country, therefore we should pay more tax to the government and feed them who were protected under Art 153 FC?

So, this is the concept of 1 Malaysia where those who cannot dominate the country financial mainstrean should deem to be categorized under Art 153? Then why "I" have left out from Art 153 protection since they did not dominate Malaysia financial syatem?

So, we are too hardworking that earn too much of money and become rich in th eyes of M, therefore M should continue being feed without thinking of how to become hardworking and innovative that compatible with us.

So, are M saying that we should not be so hardworking to make so much of money and live a life as M, so that we can acheive the aim of 1 Malaysia and be protected the same as M under Art 153 FC, Sir Ibrahim Ali?