Today is the first day of my second last trimester. As planned, I've brought several travelling information to frns to determine where to hv our final graduation trip. One thing I cant understand, I was being urged by someone to withdraw a Hong Kong trip from C gang who were our close frns. I know and understand that this is sth tht hard to inform coz no one will willing to do thing like breaking a promise. However, since matter involve 2 of us, you cant urge me only bcoz the reason of you yourself cannot do that. I know it is relunctant to be settled, but I will prefer to find out ideas together than to push all things to me alone, it is clearly not fair and act of selfishness. You alone cant do that does not mean I should be forced to do sth you do not want to do. On that time, I felt a bit of hot headed, but in order to preserve a peaceful final year and friendship, I trained myself to manage this thing patiancely. I believe, this is her character that hard to be realised herself, maybe the ppl who make her to realise of this is not me.

Result will come out a day after tml, I hv a bad sense for this coming truth. I know it will roughly be worst, I should hv tiny up my mind to be ready to accept this bad fruit from my inner heart. Nevertheless, my mind told me that I'm yet to be ready, I seems to circumventing the truth. Now, I start feeling scare that I'm not able to accept the truth which is cruel. I scare I cant bear it and start thinking extremely to my future. I scare i will lost my direction and self-esteem again. I scare being looking down by others. I scare..... but nth cured...

GOD BLESS~