An inspiring day to be remembered...

Sakae's case for submission is conducted in the afternoon today. I was riding on Yeo's Benz to High Court as usual at 2.15 p.m. The only thing that I found unusual is that he asked me to tie up the ribbon for him at car park. This might be usual for others, but I'd sensed a little akward to do that for him; maybe I've been too sensitive, still, I personaly think that such action should be reserved for someone who has closer relationship with him; to categorize me as one of them sound quite radiculous and embarrassing. I hope I really think too much in pertaining to that usual matter.

I'd felt inspired today is not because of tying ribbon for him for sure. Such inspiration is all because of my impressive performance that I've been satified with.Although I do not think that I've jotted down all the relevant notes during the submission, yet I at least did somethinig that are practical, smart and useful today. After gaining the experience from last trial, I start doubting on the pl's counsel professionality. Thus, I keep reminding myself to get back my common bundle from him. Initially, Yeo intend to take from him but he went for tea with Jerald and clients. Thank to Papa that I met him in the car park and manage to get it from him.

Later on, Yeo asked me to join them for tea. Jerald warmly invites me to KL to look for him in future. As usual, listening to their gossip, political views, jokes and many other things. O ya, I finally met Valarie, a not too tall girl who sounds nasty in the telephone conversation last time. She looks about my age, but I do not feel like wanna know her more or wanna friend with her for the simple reason that she doesnt impress me in the first place with her nasty tune.

Before riding on his benz, he put his stuffs in the car trunk then left the bonnet open as usual. After the experience last time, I was alert enough to take initiative to offer him my help. After all, he compliment that he can see that i can learn something fast. I think it is the biggest compliment from him for the time being. Heading back to the office, Yeo suddenly recalled back the common bundle that he is supposed to take from Pl, I pointing him the bundle which put at the back seat and told him I already got it from the pl, my heart burst with superiority when I saw his face was at ease. On the way to the office, he has asked me about the up coming KL trip. He also asked me few considerate questions like when I depart, where I'm going to stay, how to go to the Bar Council in the morning. last but not least "Remember to bring umbrella in case rainning"..dunno why I've felt an honour when he showed caring like this.

Nevertheless, his care for me might be a poisoning that slowly make me owing him favors or something. I wrote all this here is to remind me that never keep compliments too seriously; I have the obligation to achieve brighter career and future for myself and will never because of someone else. Keep learning and to be a better person is a life long learning process, it should never be obstructed or become stagnet because of people's perception on you are too good or too lousy.

However, when knocking off, Tee's advice in the lift make me pondering on something. He advise me to learn more from Chok and follow him to court when have opportunities. The combination of this statement and his facial expression told me not only this. The more precise interpretation from the combination of both is that "you should not only or keep following Yeo for litigation practice, you can learn more from Chok and can become better". When I told him I was following Yeo oftenly to court, his facial expression reflects his prejudice to Yeo, this is what I did not quite understand. Am I really too sensitive? Tee must got his point for what he had said to me, I should bear this in mind and find more opportunities to learn from Chok. Because, after all the one who benefited is me :)

Needless of fear; taking brave stand

4 months of chambering, a mixed feeling to me, sometimes I had had a sense of belonging for the effort I've paid and the outcome for tasks had done. Be that as it may, there is disappointment too! I gradually realize my weakness that deem overwhelming recently. A sense of guiltiness emerged when others who are trying to give chances and to see more improvement in me but unimprovement contributing their dispointment that end up discourage me. I was trying to be better each time, yet the outcomes were dissatisfying. Again, languange is the most big problem, 2nd, my impersonality that too shy to click with others, to voice out, to mix, in short, Yeo will definitely think that I'm lacking of interpersonal quality, being inarticulate, inattentive and unable to express or communicate appropriately. However, these are not my characteristic! I'm not what they have perceived and imagined. I couldnt explain why I always felling nervous when speak until others prompted me. I suppose myself a decisive and clear minded person. Who and what cause me change drastically?

I ponder whether I'm asking too much sometimes. In many times, I'll feel that whaever and whenever I speak, is inappropriate to others. But when I keep silence, peopele start pondering why I seldom reveal my insight to the matters they are concerning or discussing. I felt difficult to strike a balance to enjoy the social diversity. I sense people's hesitation on me, such as how could a pupil who is so desire to be a litigant is not outspoken or even not social able as being inarticulate in expressing herself or point of views. My inception start denying to perceive English. I know this is the serious problems in me.


Too much of unnescessary thought and self doubting contrubuting spiritual exhausted and scaterred-brain. Where is my confidence? Is the idioms "When people are giving you up; never give up yourself" the only way for me to persist my pupillage period?

A succint for a memorable Sept 10'

Sept is the most memorable month in my chambering period, is the most learned month to me.

I was giving an opportunity to follow a case with Yeo who provide every chance for me to take part in the civil proceeding. I was asked to interview our client by pretnding myself a opponent counsel. Although the outcome of my cross-examination did not satifying Yeo as usual, but i can see a little improvement in compare to my last trial. Then, I was also asked to follow Yeo to 2 days of trial. I've leraned a lot not only the way to conduct a full trial, 3 examination, how to open speech n close speech, how to assess judge to our stand, how to calm witness down when they are losing patient or temper, how to crave leave from judge for direction, how to object the opponent to posting irrelevant question,to produce the notes of evidence so on and so forth. Despite of that, I've learned from Yeo of interpersonal skills and ways of how to treat people nicer and sincere.

My admiration to him increased when he discern my personality and pointed out my shortcoming which are quite true. He said that because of i'm the youngest in the family, I've been pempered, being passive and do not know to take care of others which when I think deepened, I found that it is quite true. Of cause I was quite shocking wheh he said so, but I never felt angry or incomfortable at all. In contrary, I felt I'm such a lucky girl who met a good master and boss who willing to correct my weakness and want me to be a better person. This is something that I believed non of my coulleagues enjoyed the same benefit as me.

I've been invited to bear's nephew full moon celebration last 2 days. I was told that bear's brother-in-law doesnt click well with his mom. All in all, something revealed to me that, it is not easy to unite 2 different family by marriage. It can be easily seen through these occasion especially when the crystallization of two family occured. When both family doenst communicate well in certain matters, dispute become inevitable. However, such dispute seems to me redundant. When people care too much of how one give and take, it results in dispute.

I told Bear that, if i will have children next time, i will choose to take care myself because the children are mine, why burden our parents who at thier old age? Why confinement? Why eoropean doesnt do so but have their baby n mom survived??